Domesticated Lady

The last time I had a year this trying, I tried to kill myself. Literally. I wanted to die. I figured dying had to be less painful. Thank God I failed!!! It was the first time I ever appreciated failure... I got the help I needed, and now I help those in need. I'm in a much better place now. So no, suicidal thoughts aren't floating around my head. In fact, I'm hopeful. So much so, that I'm excited to see what 2019 has in store for me.  2018 forced me to grow mentally, emotionally and spiritually. The woman I am today is stronger and wiser than the woman who started this blog. I've been betrayed, unemployed, back-stabbed, lied on and cheated. I was used and manipulated. I was cast out and misquoted. I have grieved the death of a friend and the death of a relationship . I have stayed up at night worrying about people I care about the most. I have had hiccups and upsets all while navigating the day-to-day life of a wife/mom/teacher. And yet... I...

It amazes me how often I'm asked, "But HOW do you manage it ALL?" Saying that I homeschool is enough for most people to think I'm nuts or have some type of super power. But when they learn that I homeschool AND work AND run the budget AND clean the house 99% of the time AND read books for fun & development AND prepare for Sunday School AND cook 95% of ALL of our meals ALL while managing my weight (90 lbs down) AND my lupus, they start to look ill. Or, they simply don't believe me. To be fair, before I grew to this point, I would have felt the same way. I also would have felt inadequate in my own efforts to manage my life. But, I don't like for people to have to dwell in the dark places that had once consumed me. So, I'm going to share my secret. A few years ago I was listening to a CD that changed my life. I don't remember the name of the CD or the man speaking. But, I remember feeling empowered once it was finished. A little bit of bac...

And I'm BACK!!! The month of May was so full, that I needed to take a recovery break. I truly believe in self-care, and that charity begins at home. Furthermore, sticking to my beliefs allowed me to avoid a serious illness that usually brings up the rear of busy periods. See, there was the 1.5 hour road trip and carnival during the first weekend, Mother's Day on weekend number 2, the Walk to End Lupus Now on the third weekend, and we rounded the month off with our fun-filled holiday weekend. Of course, I still had to tend to my domesticated duties and home school responsibilities during this busy season. And there's still my client whose needs must be met 5 days a week. Also, I was captain of my lupus walk team, and that comes with so many extra responsibilities, that I'm still trying to figure out how I survived the month. And if I didn't have enough to deal with, there were the attitudes and lack of follow-through from people who had committed to help, bu...

"Repeat after me", my young pastor instructed from behind the pulpit. "I do NOT belong to myself!" "I do NOT belong to myself", chanted the congregation in stunned obedience. And that's when it hit me, again. I'm simply here to serve so that I can fulfill my earthly purpose . Once I have, it'll be time for me to go live with Jesus. You see, until I fulfill my requirements, I'm going to remain here. Regardless of the lupus I have, the neighborhood I live in and/or the obstacles I face. Therefore, none of those things should take up more time than what's needed to move pass them, so that I can keep moving along. In fact, I am certain that each of those things are distractions meant to keep me from reaching the goal.  Well, not today Satan. I'm fortunate in that, I know what my spiritual gift is. I was made to be a teacher . But not in the traditional way. The funny thing is, I never wanted to be a teacher , but life's...

Today is my mom's 48th birthday!!! WooHoo!!! She gave birth to me when she was 16 years old and then gave me two sisters by the time she was 18. This means that she gets to enjoy her empty nest and her grandchildren before reaching menopause.  That is not something that will happen for me, so I think it's pretty darn cool. In celebration of my mom, I will shine a little light on a lesson she worked tirelessly to instill in my sisters and I: Excellence without Excuses. Now, she didn't call it that. Her language was a bit more colorful back in the day. What she called it is irrelevant to what she meant and how it's still relevant. If my mother told us to clean the kitchen, simply washing the dishes wasn't going to cut it. We had to wash dishes, clean the counter, stove, table and floor nightly. Once a week we were required to clean the inside of the refrigerator. Of course, we also had to handle the trash. Anything less meant we had failed to do what we were...